I wonder why it is that we fight ourselves so much. Why do we work so hard (professionally and personally) that we don’t even feel comfortable taking a day off?
I plaster my desktop with fantastic beaches, great forest retreats, and majestic wonders of the world – and almost every picture has footprints, or a trail or a sidewalk that I use to imagine that I’m actually running in those beautiful places. When it comes right down to it, though, I spend all of my time in front of this computer, connected to it in a way that is more binding than a physical restraint. I’ve convinced myself that the whole world would erupt in flames if I didn’t check my work email every 5 seconds - and good thing outlook has that little mail envelope alert, otherwise I might not get the email the second it pops into my box - oh and I’m glad that I have my blackberry pinging away next to me, or I might miss the envelope alert.
I know what my body needs to be able to progress – and a day off once a week, and a recovery week once a month are both requirements to a healthy me. They are non-negotiable. Yet somehow, every Thursday afternoon, when I start to prepare for the next morning, I think to myself “Maybe just a very slow swim….” or “I really didn’t get as much biking done as I wanted to this week” or some other excuse crops up into my mind, that makes me actually feel guilty for sleeping in until 6:30am on Friday morning. It’s not like I don’t have a 7am conference call on Fridays to get me out of bed anyway – I actually still feel guilty for sleeping just a little bit longer than most mornings.
Well this week I’m not allowing it. I’m taking Friday off, with nothing to do, and no plans to make it “acceptable”. I’m not going to look at my blackberry, and I’m certainly not getting on the computer. I’m not going to feel guilty about it either. I’m going to get a pedicure, and I might even buy something new for myself that’s not budgeted, and that I don’t need. I’m going to take a nap at least once, and I think some chocolate chip pancakes are in my future.
I’m hoping this disconnection with my checklist, clockwatching, budgeting, email self can last all the way through the long weekend to Tuesday morning. However, I will be satisfied if I can truly try to relax for one day.
Wishing you a safe, pleasant, and disconnected holiday weekend!